A big thanks to Kim of  So Many Places for contributing the following post as the February 15th Travel Instigator. Stay tuned for a feature post and Q and A from a new adventurous female traveler the 15th and 30th of every month.

On my blog I’ve documented the two-year journey my husband and I have been on to save money, sell our stuff, quit our jobs, and set off to travel around the world.  There have been many ups and downs, and I’ve tried to write honestly about them all.

One undeniable downer is the negativity I am sometimes met with when I tell people about our plans.  I try not to spend too much energy dwelling on these negative interactions, but the truth is that there are plenty of naysayers, and it can be discouraging to encounter them.

The sad truth is that not everyone will support your dreams, especially if your dreams are unconventional.  Do you want to take a job as a financial analyst and buy a four-bedroom house in the suburbs?  Sure, most people will get behind that.  Do you want to move to Paraguay for a fire-breathing apprenticeship?  Prepare yourself for naysayers.

Based on my own experience, below you’ll find a list of common naysayers and some strategies I’ve used to combat them.

The Do It When You’re Old naysayer- This type of naysayer will try to convince you that it’s unnecessary to follow your dreams now.  Instead, they reason, if you just wait 30 years you can follow your dreams when you retire.

The Do It When You’re Old naysayer wears you down by subtly hinting that you are destroying your life by focusing on the present instead of the future.

Image Courtesy of Contagious Courtney

The Ignore It and Make It Go Away naysayer- This is a silent form of naysaying and occurs when friends and family don’t ask about or aren’t interested in your plans.  You’ll feel this form of un-support during conversations in which, when your big dream comes up, the naysayer quickly redirects the flow of conversation.  Likewise, when sharing an exciting announcement or milestone, the Ignore It and Make It Go Away naysayer will force a smile, weakly mutter “oh, that’s exciting” and then move on.

The Fear Factor naysayer- Everyone has a cautionary tale.  The Fear Factor naysayer will be the first to tell you about his Great-Uncle Bob who caught malaria in Africa or next-door neighbor’s daughter whose bus careened off a cliff in Peru.  To the Fear Factor naysayer the world is a very scary place most safely experienced via flat screen TV from the comfort of the couch.

The Whittle-It-Down naysayer- This kind of naysayers will try you talk you down into a smaller version of your dream.  When Brian and I announced our plans, the Whittle-It-Down naysayers tried to convince us that a three-week vacation should satiate our need to travel and that taking a creative writing class at the community college would be just as satisfying as devoting a whole year to writing.  The Whittle It Down-ers want you to be “realistic.”

Fight the Naysayers

There’s no one way to deflect naysayers but remembering these truths always helps me keep things in perspective.

You’re Holding a Mirror

Some people perceive your decision to chase your dreams as a rejection of the things they’ve embraced in their own life.  When others watch you take a big leap, it causes them to ponder the possibilities of their own life.  They wonder: What would my life be like if I chased my dream?  Sometimes, the example you set leads them to be brave and take chances in their own life.  Sometimes, the example you set makes them feel uncomfortable or resentful.  Try to put yourself in their shoes and be sensitive to the emotions that your dream-chasing may be stirring up in them.

Your Decisions Affect Others

Your dream is about you but your decision to pursue it affects those around you.  Embarking on a big trip is exciting, but those you leave behind will worry about your safety.  You’re leaving your daily routine for a grand adventure, but there will suddenly be a hole in the lives of your friends who see you every day.  This is a remarkably exciting time for you, but those that love you are losing you for a little while, that sucks for them.

Let People Surprise You

Sure, you’ll encounter naysayers, but for every person who bashes your dream two more will show up ringing cowbells.  Your biggest cheerleaders will likely come for unexpected places: The secretary at work who brings you travel stories she’s torn from the newspaper or your buttoned-up Aunt Sue who sends you a heartfelt email telling you how proud she is.  Let people surprise you, and when they do, remember to tell them how grateful you are for their support.

Q and A with Kim

1. Do you remember the moment when you and Brian actually committed to making your ‘Round the World (RTW) dream a reality? Was there a tipping point?

Well, there was a moment, a tipping point that changed everything, but I’ve never written about it because I’m saving it for that book I dream of writing one day!

Overall, though, this RTW dream was something that we built up to over time. Brian and I lead a very conventional life: We met in college, got jobs, got married, bought a house- the whole nine yards. A few years into it, I realized I wasn’t happy. I’d never stopped to ask myself what I really wanted out of life, I’d just sort of allowed myself to be swept away by the currant. When I took a step back to ask myself what I really wanted, I realized that I didn’t want the 9 to 5, the mortgage, the two cars, the house full of stuff. I wanted adventure and freedom. I wanted to write. And I wanted to see the world. I knew I couldn’t live the rest of my life wondering what might have been if I’d just been brave enough to follow my dream.

I’m lucky because, when I told Brian what I needed to do, he was supportive. Brian’s journey through all of this has been just as impressive (or more impressive) than my own. I’ve watched Brian begin to excavate all of those old things he’d dreamed of doing and begin to believe in them again. (Brian wrote a great post (one of only two he’s ever written on the site) about his experience coming to terms with the implications of following my dreams: http://www.so-many-places.com/2011/03/coming-to-terms-with-life-change).

2. With so many incredible destinations before you, is there one that you feel especially excited?

I am excited about them all! I find myself overwhelmed with excitement five times a day and always for different reasons- I might be overcome with joy over our U.S. road trip and then five minutes later I’m dreaming of Peru or India.

I am a mountain girl, so I can’t wait to hike through all of the world’s most amazing mountains: The U.S.’s Grand Tetons, the Andes, the Himalayas. I lay awake at night in anticipation.

3. You’re a beer lover and we actually share a favorite brewery in Portland–Deschutes Brewery! What’s your favorite kind of beer? Recommendations?

I loooove Deschutes, it’s my all-time favorite brewery. They are actually based out of Bend, Oregon, which is perhaps my favorite place in the world. Brian and I got married in Bend, and we served Deschutes Mirror Pond (a pale ale) at our wedding!

My favorite type of beer is, hands down, IPA. The more hops the better. I love Deschutes Hop Henge. I also love Sierra Nevada Torpedo Extra IPA, Ninkasi Total Domination IPA (amazing), and Widmer X-114. I could go on and on…

4. You leave for your RTW in May, how much planning is done before-the-fact and how much during?

Well, I am trying to fight my urge to plan everything and go as un-planned as possible. For example, we know we’ll be road-tripping the U.S. from the end of May through the middle of August. Out of necessity, we have had to make some plans. For example, we want to get a permit to backpack the Grand Canyon rim-to-rim, and that means we need to pick dates in advance. We’ve also booked a cabin at Yellowstone during specific dates, so we know when we’re going to be in Yellowstone.

We fly to Ecuador on 8/15 and we have a hostel booked for four nights. After that, the future is wide open, we just need to make it to Buenos Aires, Argentina before Christmas to meet up with friends. The day after Christmas we’re flying to India for a grand adventure. Those are the only hard plans we have so far.

5. Describe one moment/story from your childhood that still captures who you are.

When I was a girl my mom had a best friend named Barb who had a beautiful daughter named Lindy. Lindy was a few years older than me and I adored her, everyone else did too. She was cute and stylish. She sewed her own clothes and excelled at everything. She was clearly the apple of her mother’s eye.

One day my mom and Barb dropped Lindy and I off at the mall with a big wad of cash. Lindy had earned hers babysitting but my mom had to give me mine. It was not typical for my mom to fork over cash so that I could go to the mall, but I could tell she wanted me to have a girly experience shopping with Lindy.

When Barb and my mom picked us up a few hours later, the women ohh’d and ahh’d as Lindy unveiled the sundresses and skorts she’d purchased. After Lindy’s new clothes had been appropriately fawned over, my mom turned to me and asked what I had bought.

I ruffled through my bag and enthusiastically revealed my purchases- $70 worth of troll dolls. I’d bought the soccer player troll, the bride and groom trolls and the lucky lottery troll. Really. I still laugh thinking about it.

That story just about sums me up perfectly. I’ve always been just a little bit different than the mainstream.

6. How do you and Brian expect your travel styles to compliment each other/frustrate each other?

This has yet to be determined because we have never traveled together for more than a two week vacation. We talk about it all the time, though. Brian and I have very different strengths and weaknesses. Brian is calm and level headed and I get frustrated easily. I’m highly adaptable and Brian is slightly more cautious.

Brian and I were both raised in the mid-west and we still carry around that damn mid-western politeness with us. It isn’t a bad thing necessarily, but we both have a tendency to keep our mouths shut and deal with whatever comes our way instead of sticking up for ourselves when we need to. I think this is something that we will both have to learn to work around while we are on the road.

7. A travel movie based on your travels is in the works. (Don’t get excited, this is hypothetical.) Who would direct the film and who would play the parts of the non-conventional and courageous inspirations, Kim and Brian?

This is the hardest question of all! I have no idea who the director would be. I don’t know much about movies. I have a hard time even sitting through a movie, I’m always trying to do three things at once.

Joseph Gordon-Levitt would be the perfect actor to play Brian. He’s humble and shy and kind and charming in a quiet way.

Brian thinks that Ellen Page should play me! But I’m not that sarcastic. I lean more towards Sandra Bullock. She’s tough and knows how to laugh at herself.

8. As an avid runner, you know what it feels like to hit the proverbial “wall,” what thought pulls you out of it?

I am way too familiar with that wall!

When I hit the wall I literally just take it one step at a time. I have a mantra that I repeat to myself which I heard from the Olympic marathoner Ryan Hall: “Run the mile you are in.” It’s a great philosophy for running and life. Don’t look back at how far you’ve traveled or ahead at how far you still need to go, just run the mile you are in. It’s the only thing that matters.

9. Do you ever expect to return to a conventional life?

Oh man. I have no idea. I know that I cannot return to a cubicle. I will not return to a cubicle. But, can I travel forever? Do I want to? I can’t be sure. My ultimate dream is to write for a living. I want to have a cabin in the mountains. I want to be able to walk out of my front door and go for a run in the forest. I want to have the flexibility to travel when I want. That is my dream life- is it conventional?

10. One book you recommend:

Only one?! The Alchemist by Paulo Coelho

11. One song you can’t stop listening to at-the-moment on your iPod:

I’m embarrassed to admit that I don’t own an iPod. However! I am currently obsessed with the song Somebody That I Used To Know by Gotye. I am also forever devoted to Mumford and Sons and Van Morrison.

Want More From Kim?

Kim Dinan

Bio: Kim is a writer and runner currently living in Portland, Oregon. In May, 2012 she will quit her job and leave the comforts of home to embark on a trip around the world with her husband. She documents her journey to follow her dreams on her blog So Many Places.

Follow Her (Blog): http://www.so-many-places.com

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